AN AUTHOR'S GUIDE TO WRITING REALISTIC BROKENESS AND GRACE-FILLED REDEMPTION.
Readers who want stories about seasoned marriages overcoming heartache and spouses who fall in love all over again is a vastly underserved demographic. Especially in the fantasy and sci-fi genres! Personally, I would love to see more books with already-married MCs. If you're a writer who would like to dip your toes into this much needed and bittersweet sub-genre but don't know where to start, allow me to offer a few tips from from someone who has lived through a broken marriage being saved by God and written 3 already-married romance novels so far:
— 1 —
Don't gloss over your couple's brokenness.
A marriage is a union of two sinners who have been called to represent Christ and the Church. But because we are sinners, we all fail spectacularly at that lofty calling. Readers who want these kinds of stories don't pick them up because their life and marriage have been perfect. They want to feel seen and understood. Perfect couples are less believable than magic systems or dragon riders by far. Do us a favor and show us the mess.
— 2 —
Make sure both spouses have at least one identifiable sin issue that contributed to the brokenness.
It is so easy when our marriages are rocky to look at our spouse and say, "This is all your fault." One person may have more obvious or more grievous sins than the other, but if you take a good look at yourself and your own depravity, you'll realize that you are also to blame for the dysfunction in your relationship. Make your characters reflect this, and remember that we don't want our readers to root for one of the characters to "win." They should be rooting for the couple to overcome their struggles together.
— 3 —
Don't be afraid of the miscommunication trope!
Yes, yes, I know some readers complain about it, but the point here is to write realistic brokenness and realistic healing. Perfect communication is simply not realistic — if you've ever had any kind of relationship with another human being, you know that. Here's a good rule of thumb to help you avoid writing annoying miscommunication tropes: if the issue could be solved with a single sentence on a sticky note, it's not a good thing to turn into a plot point. But if it requires explanation, nuance, maturity, grace, or forgiveness to navigate, you're probably in the clear. And as a plus, improving communication throughout the story is a great way to display character growth for your couple!
— 4 —
Write about marriage-bed intimacy (but don't get graphic about it).
I will never condone smut in literature, but intimacy is a normal and essential part of a healthy marriage, and it's good to acknowledge that. Keep it brief, keep it clean, keep it godly, but do try to reference it in some way. One of my goals as an author is to encourage my readers to fall more in love with their own spouses, and reminding them of the goodness of this God-given gift is one tool I use to do that. For authors trying to find "the line" that's appropriate when it comes to writing about intimacy, a good litmus test can be asking yourself if you'd want your spouse or pastor to read the scene. If not, rework it. Christians don't need to be afraid of writing about these things, we just need to be careful, Christlike, and biblical in the ways we do it.
— 5 —
Healing and forgiveness take time; let your story reflect that.
Linger on the wounds and walk your characters through the struggle of repentance and grace. For the sake of the story, I definitely do accelerate the timeline of healing for my characters (instead of taking years I get them there in months). But I do take them through arguments, apologies, mistrust, forgiveness, surrender, relapse, and finally rebuilding trust. Healing is not a one-page thing.
— 6 —
Include the gospel and the beauty of grace and growth that are possible through Jesus Christ alone.
Yes, I know not everyone is called to write blatantly Christian fiction, nor am I saying that you have to, but there is no true redemption without Christ. Draw on themes of grace from the Bible and make sure that the lessons your characters learn adhere to the word of God. The best way to do this is to immerse yourself in scripture. Fill yourself so full of it that when you sit down to write, it comes spilling out at the seams.
— 7 —
Pray, pray, pray.
Pray before you open your editing software to write. Pray throughout the chapter. Pray as you edit. Pray as you study and pray as you market. This is not an easy subgenre to write. It tears open old wounds and leaves you aching for your readers. It reminds you of how fragile your own relationships have been and makes you praise God with open arms and tears of wonder at how He can turn the most wretched beginnings into the most beautiful endings. He is the perfect Bridegroom that every other marriage is desperately trying to emulate. He is also the God of Words, who spoke the world into existence, who wrote the greatest love story ever told, and who became the Word made flesh so He could ransom His bride from the grave. He can give you the words you need to glorify Him.
Please Note:
There are TONS of books with arranged marriage/marriage of convenience tropes where the wedding comes first and the love comes later. I adore these stories and would not presume to gatekeep the term "already-married romance" from them. That being said, they're usually about a couple falling in love for the first time, which doesn't really scratch my itch for seasoned relationships and falling for your own spouse all over again. When I look for books about already-married romance, a brand new love is not what I have in mind. My seven tips are for writing realistic, imperfect marriages that have gone through ups and downs long before we meet the characters on the pages.
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